What About Socialization?

I was poking around online looking for some more information about the standardized tests that one of the local homeschool groups is administering this year, when I ran across these gems:

“Although [these test] scores are very helpful for professionals, nonprofessionals can confuse them with IQ scores, so they are generally not reported to parents and lay organizations. Percentile ranks and stanines are better suited for general audiences.”

“Only someone who is thoroughly familiar with the student, the curriculum, and the instructional resources that are available can choose wisely among the various educational options.

While education professionals are best qualified to interpret and use this test information, parents also play a critical role in their children’s education. If you would like to help as a parent, please contact your child’s teacher to discuss some ways to cultivate your son or daughter’s reasoning abilities at home.”

Translation: Please, folks, leave it up to the professionals! We know that you’re all clearly too stupid to process these test scores, let alone manage your child’s education.

So after I finished alternately laughing and swearing at my husband about the arrogance and condescension of these test authors, I thought I’d come share the love with all of you.

But, for the love of all things holy, DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME!

So today involved emotional breakdowns, the Powerpuff Girls, and Nintendo DS. And not much else. Why are you laughing again?

Yesterday was one of those Hallmark-perfect days that you dream about when you think of the joys of homeschooling. Let’s take a few quick peeks. (Cue the softfocus lens)

10 AM: Here in the living room, you see the child lying on the couch, listening with rapt attention while Mom reads to her about the Constitution.

12 PM: The whole family now gathers at the table for their afternoon meal, a healthy and delicious melange of noodles and veggies. The child begs to continue reading The Voyage of Lewis and Clark while eating.

1 PM: Now Mom is cheerfully cleaning the house, popping in every once in a while to answer a question or two about the math that the child is diligently working at on the dining room table.

4 PM “Awh, mom, can’t we do some MORE schoolwork? Please?”

6 PM: Child grabs two volumes of the encyclopedia to bring with her to dinner at the restaurant.

9 PM: Mom tucks the smiling and cooperative child into bed to rest up for another day.

So, I figure since I now have this whole homeschooling and housework thing down, it’s pretty much easy sailing from here until she’s 18.

What. Why are you laughing at me?

It’s been extremely unseasonably warm here in Chicagoland for the last few days.  So we decided to spend the day at the lovely Morton Arboretum with our friends.  It is a different kind of beautiful out there this time of year– gold and russet grasses, bright purple rosebush canes, and multicolored mushrooms.  Lydia was very sad that she had forgotten her camera at home.

We had planned on “starting schoolwork again” that day, which must’ve gotten my head stuck in “I must make this a learning experience” mode.  While Lydia and our 4 year old friend were running around trying to see who could find the biggest rock to throw into the pond, I was on the trail, shouting, “Hey guys! Come see this cool mushroom!” and “Wow, I think this is an owl pellet, come look!”

Lydia reluctantly approached.  ”I’m looking at this owl pellet to see if we can find the bones from his last meal.  Look, honey, I think that’s a mousejaw.”  This yielded more squeals and an announcement from Lydia that she was going to stay as far away from me as possible, thanks.

The four-year-old was focused on scientific experiments: determining how far he could run from us before his mom freaked out and testing to see which pebble made the biggest splash.  But the squeal of “Eeeeeww, mom, why are you poking at that poo with a stick!?!?” sent him running in our direction.

“POO I want a stick so I can poke at poo too! HA HA HA, Lisa, look there’s more poo! I’m going to find some more poo to poke” and off he ran.

His mother can cherish memories of our lovely trip to see some nature; the constant reminders of our beautiful day will be at hand for quite some time.

“HEY MOM let’s go out today and find some more poo! I said poo, did you hear me say that when I said poo?!?  Wait I think there’s some can I pick it up, huh can I mom pllleeeeease??”

I hope she speaks to me again.

It’s the question that every homeschooler has heard at least once: “Yes, but what about socialization?” It comes from worried grandparents, well-meaning third cousins, and nosy disapproving strangers at the grocery store. Here, we try to let our child out of the basement AT LEAST once a month.  And she even goes outside occasionally. For chores, of course.